All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).

306_afore...wav(41K) 306_afore...mp3(41K)

: "The first party of the first panda may sue the second party panda unless that panda was that panda's aforementioned panda."

306_article36.wav(45K) 306_article36.mp3(45K)

: "One panda may not make sexual comments about another Panda's appearance."

306_assshape.wav(33K) 306_assshape.mp3(33K)

: "Your honor, this young man made a comment about the shape of my ass."

306_asssucker.wav(41K) 306_asssucker.mp3(41K)

: "You would think that you ass sucker."

306_badger.wav(47K) 306_badger.mp3(47K)

: "Hello kids, I'm Happy The Don't Do Stuff That Might Irritate Your Inner Ear Badger."

306_beaut...wav(43K) 306_beaut...mp3(43K)

: "Hey beautiful woman!  We don't take kindly to your types around here!"

306_bebead.wav(41K) 306_bebead.mp3(41K)

: "After a boy in my class tried to put his tongue in my mouth, I knew i needed legal help."

306_calmd...wav(25K) 306_calmd...mp3(25K)

: "Now, calm down Skeeter, he ain't hurtin nobody."

306_cartm...wav(104K) 306_cartm...mp3(104K)

: "The way his eyes kept looking at me, as slowly going up and down my body, like he was undressing me with his eyes."

306_cartmansi...wav(19K) 306_cartmansi...mp3(19K)

: "Get down, get down with your bad self!"

306_cartmansued.wav(73K) 306_cartmansued.mp3(73K)

: "Eric Cartman, it is the judgement of this court that you sexually harasssed Pip Phillip at school."

306_cartmantoys.wav(82K) 306_cartmantoys.mp3(82K)

: "Do you really like this remote control truck? Yeah dude, that's my favorite toy!  Oh well, I'll just take that then."

306_chinatibet.wav(39K) 306_chinatibet.mp3(39K)

: "If you pandas are from mountainous areas of China and Tibet, how come you eat bamboo which is prone to grow only in dryer more arid regions?"

306_clydead.wav(31K) 306_clydead.mp3(31K)

: "Kyle's dad got me 1.4 million, and he can do it for you too.  Just look at all these beautiful girls!"

306_complaint.wav(47K) 306_complaint.mp3(47K)

: "Dude, you got a lawyer?"

306_confession.wav(147K) 306_confession.mp3(147K)

: "Alright, alright, I killed him!"

306_confuseme.wav(28K) 306_confuseme.mp3(28K)

: "You're trying to confuse me now aren't you?"

306_countrytune.wav(46K) 306_countrytune.mp3(46K)

: "The song that plays in the bar."

306_desks.wav(65K) 306_desks.mp3(65K)

: "Where's our desks?"

306_didnothing.wav(32K) 306_didnothing.mp3(32K)

: "He is a little ass sucker."

306_disruptive.wav(87K) 306_disruptive.mp3(87K)

: "Okay children, I'm having a real problem with you all having lawyers, it is really disrupting class time."

306_donot...wav(29K) 306_donot...mp3(29K)

: "We do not tolerate sexual harassment."

306_dontanswer.wav(18K) 306_dontanswer.mp3(18K)

: "Can you tell me when Ulysses S. Grant was President?"

306_everyone.wav(79K) 306_everyone.mp3(79K)

: "This is case # 47G, Everyone vs. Everyone."

306_falcon.wav(36K) 306_falcon.mp3(36K)

: "Hey kids, I'm Jimmy The Don't Hold On To A Large Magnet While Someone Else Uses a Fan Nearby Falcon"

306_freak...wav(6K) 306_freak...mp3(6K)

: "This is freaking me out dude!"

306_freemoney.wav(66K) 306_freemoney.mp3(66K)

: "There's no such thing as free money.  When you sue somebody, you take money away from parks and schools and charities and put it in your own pocket."

306_fullycondo...wav(54K) 306_fullycondo...mp3(54K)

: "Kids, what I meant to say is that I fully condone you all having lawyers and support your legal recourses in every way."

306_getme...wav(9K) 306_getme...mp3(9K)

: "Ug, dude, get me outta here!"

306_guilty.wav(49K) 306_guilty.mp3(49K)

: "I need to hear your defense. Uh, I'm 8?"

306_herewego.wav(12K) 306_herewego.mp3(12K)

: "Kyle I need to explain something to you..."

306_icecream.wav(25K) 306_icecream.mp3(25K)

: "Panda's love ice cream."

306_impor...wav(103K) 306_impor...mp3(103K)

: "Hello cubs, I'm Don't Sue People Panda with a important message for you."

306_incriminate.wav(37K) 306_incriminate.mp3(37K)

: "I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may incinerate me."

306_killedkenny.wav(42K) 306_killedkenny.mp3(42K)

: "Oh my God, they killed Kenny!  You Bastards!"

306_kylesdad.wav(171K) 306_kylesdad.mp3(171K)

: "Kyle's Dad's Commercial."

306_legalfee.wav(25K) 306_legalfee.mp3(25K)

: "As your legal fee you can choose between the green choo-choo and the squishy football."

306_lumpypotato.wav(44K) 306_lumpypotato.mp3(44K)

: "All I can server you for lunch is lumpy potatoes."

306_model...wav(20K) 306_model...mp3(20K)

: "Uh huh, that model airplane kit? Go on..."

306_newmessage.wav(65K) 306_newmessage.mp3(65K)

: "You used to use your Panda Powers to teach people about sexual harassment, but you need to teach a new message."

306_newscast.wav(143K) 306_newscast.mp3(143K)

: "Personally I think Kyle's dad is just a whore, taking advantage of everyone in town..."

306_noidea.wav(20K) 306_noidea.mp3(20K)

: "Did you know that sexual harassment was going on in the classroom?"

306_oinky.wav(43K) 306_oinky.mp3(43K)

: "Oink, oink, be sure to run around with scissors says Oinky The Run Around With Scissors Pig."

306_okbaby.wav(16K) 306_okbaby.mp3(16K)

: "Mr. Garrison, I will remind you that we are in court!"

306_oralsex.wav(25K) 306_oralsex.mp3(25K)

: "Well, when one little panda asks another little panda to perform oral sex, that is sexual harassment."

306_pandacostu...wav(73K) 306_pandacostu...mp3(73K)

: "..Ok, you are a Panda..."

306_pandaintro.wav(116K) 306_pandaintro.mp3(116K)

: "Please welcome Petey The Sexual Harassment Panda."

306_pandapunch.wav(55K) 306_pandapunch.mp3(55K)

: "How would you like a big Panda Punch in the Puss?"

306_pandasmouth.wav(17K) 306_pandasmouth.mp3(17K)

: "There, you have it, straight from the Horse's mouth!"

306_rustynail.wav(???K) 306_rustynail.mp3(???K)

: "I have to write on the chalK)"

306_sayhi.wav(21K) 306_sayhi.mp3(21K)

: "Say hi to Sexual Harassment Panda!"

306_shutup.wav(41K) 306_shutup.mp3(41K)

: "God Damn it Skeeter shut the hell up!"

306_skeeterpanda.wav(173K) 306_skeeterpanda.mp3(173K)

: "We don't take kindly to your types in here!"

306_sorrytoots.wav(15K) 306_sorrytoots.mp3(15K)

: "You are the witness here Mr. Garrison not Mr. Hat."

306_suethelawyer.wav(26K) 306_suethelawyer.mp3(26K)

: "Yeah, lets sue the lawyer!"

306_suetheschool.wav(75K) 306_suetheschool.mp3(75K)

: "Why should I sue the school?"

306_suing...wav(30K) 306_suing...mp3(30K)

: "I'm telling you guys, suing people kicks ass!"

306_takea...wav(44K) 306_takea...mp3(44K)

: "It says right here that now I can sue you and take all of your money!"

306_takekindly.wav(154K) 306_takekindly.mp3(154K)

: "Hey 8 year old, we don't take kindly to your types in here!"

306_tellm...wav(29K) 306_tellm...mp3(29K)

: "I'm going to write a sentence on the board and I want you to tell me the noun."

306_thigh.wav(27K) 306_thigh.mp3(27K)

: "This girl touched my thigh!"

306_tickle.wav(54K) 306_tickle.mp3(54K)

: "Now does anybody know what sexual harassment means?"

306_underage.wav(55K) 306_underage.mp3(55K)

: "Since the defandant is underage and has no monetary resources it is the judgement of this court that 50 percent of Stan Marsh's belongs are to be handed over to Eric Cartman immediately."

306_underwear.wav(45K) 306_underwear.mp3(45K)

: "Did you know when one little panda pulls on another little panda's underwear thats sexual harassment?"

306_whatiam.wav(73K) 306_whatiam.mp3(73K)

: "Its because I'm a panda isn't it?"

306_willyear.wav(32K) 306_willyear.mp3(32K)

: "And when one little panda puts his little furry little willy in another panda's ear, that makes me a very sad panda."

306_willythewo...wav(60K) 306_willythewo...mp3(60K)

: "I'm Willy The Don't Stare Directly Into the Sun Worm!"